Time for yourself, what’s that??? I struggle with this each and every day. I want to spend time with my kids. I love spending time with their smiling, and sometimes screaming, faces. I don’t like to leave them.
It took me a while to figure out just what my fear was: Was I afraid that some one/thing would hurt them? No, not really. Our home is very safe, and for the most part (if I ever did leave my children) I would be leaving them with their Dad. P.S. - I have a 15 month old and a 3 month old, in case you were wondering. Was it because they would miss me, and I would miss them? No. I believe that it is important to miss someone, especially children, because you start to learn to become independent. (I am convinced, however, that my children will never leave the house. That would be just too much for my little heart to handle.) Then it dawned on me…..
....I am deathly afraid that if I leave them, even for a short period of time, that is when they will do something big. Like, the first time my son says “Mama!” (yes, my son is 15 months old….and has yet to say “Mama”, sigh. At least he is cute, haha)! I know, I know….irrational. But, that is how I feel. I would hate to miss, even one thing, just because I wanted (no, it’s truly a need), eh needed, time to myself.
Then I started to think rationally, how likely is it that something will happen while I am “gone”? I am with my children 99% of the time, so they are probably glad to get rid of me that measly one percent. :)
So, I started out slow. At first, I would only leave for two hours, twice a month, to get groceries. Other than that my kids had me 24/7 (Lord help them! I don’t know anyone who would want to spend 24 hours a day with me!!!).
Then I realized (after losing it a few too many times!) I needed more than just twice a month. I needed to get away daily, just to recharge my batteries.
So now, I leave my wonderfully cute children for about a half hour each day. I do very simple things:
Ex. #1 - Escape to our bedroom while my wonderful husband watched the kids (which is exactly what he is doing now, isn’t he great?!?!). During this time I: read, blog, watch t.v., or just relax.
Ex. #2 - Tanning. Yes people, I know it is bad for you…but, it is so relaxing. I turn on the bed, click into my Pandora app., and turn into a bronze goddess. Haha, okay not really a bronze goddess. That is just wishful thinking.
Ex. #3 - Take a drive. Yes, I will normally run an errand or two (or three or four) while I am out. But, when I am done with those errands, I embrace the open road. Taking forgotten roads winding through corn fields, and admire the sun setting across the orange-ish sky.
Okay, so you get my point. Just do something that relaxes you.
Believe me ladies, you need this time to yourself. Carve out a little bit, even 15 minutes, a day just to do something you enjoy. You will be a much better wife, mother, friend, daughter, aunt, and any other titles you might associate with yourself.
Let me know what works for you….what relaxes you? How do you carve out time for yourself?