How to navigate marriage with a newborn

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Sleepless nights. Practically zero alone time. A budget stretched tight. And the crying—lots of crying. Having a new baby can be one of the most challenging changes a couple can go through, but it can also be one of the most rewarding.

If you’re seeking advice on how to navigate marriage with a newborn and bond with your spouse post-baby, check out what these five moms had to say.

  1. “Date nights. Understanding. For us, (and I think I am uniquely blessed this way) we are in a marriage where we share 100% of the work. We each do what needs to be done when it needs done. We are on baby #6, and we have a well established rhythm. With our first, he really wanted to participate and since I was nursing he couldn’t feed him… So he would change his diapers and bring him to me to nurse. He says those are some of his best memories of starting out. My best advice to couples starting out is that if you recognize that everything is a team effort and just do your best to get things done (wash/dishes/etc.) things run a lot smoother.” –Jamie J.
  2. “I stay at home. I do almost all the childcare related responsibilities as well as keep up the house. I know my hubby works hard at his job and so I let him slack a bit at home. He will be helping more once we have baby #2 this December. His job will allow him more time off too. I think it’s important to continue date nights as much as you can even if it’s just the two of you going to fast food. It helps keep your relationship going.” –Heather M.
  3. “I find it nearly impossible. We both work full-time and depend on my family for daycare. W/o them, I’d have to quit and we’d be struggling way worse financially. We struggle a lot in our relationship but our little girl comes first and things will get easier as she gets more independent. She’s 1 now and things are easier now then when she was a newborn. But yeah, marriage really gets put to the test once having a baby!” –Kimberly Z.
  4. “I’m a stay at home mom. I support my husband, and take care of my kids. I don’t know how it can be done any other way. I’m slightly envious of 2 income families because I miss working, but I just don’t know how it’s done. I tried it and was completely worn out after 2 weeks. My husband worked days and I worked nights. It was really hard on us both so I quit. Being mom to a toddler and newborn and being a wife is a full time job. Christ helps me through each day and I love my family more then anything so it is all worth it.” –Ashley R.
  5. “Communicate and don’t forget to tell each other I love you.” –Valerie K.
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